I could be on NCIS

So, I am completely annoyed by a Facebook phenomenon. It shouldn't be somethign that annoys me, but it does. I can't explain way, except that every time I detect it going on I roll my eyes, suck in a breath, and then slowly exhale while whispering, "You aren't fooling anyone, honey."

Because I am smart and posses the skills to deduce and interpret intimations. In fact, it's so obvious I think my dog could figure it out and she doesn't posess the mental capacity to know that cat poop is not a nutritious snack.

I could immediately blow the cover off this thinly veiled secret in the comments section, but I don't. Guess I'm just a super mature person who will only passive-agressively write about it in hypothetical terms on my blog that no one reads.

So for all those girlfriends of mine who are in the early stages of being knocked up, which is actually quite a few because I'm in my mid-twenties, stop posting how sick you feel, how exhausted you are, or just random declarations about how exciting the future is but golly gee, I can't tell you why just yet. Proceeded by multiple smiley faces, or cryptic messages from your closest friends who are already in on the secret.

Uh, I think I've figured it out. Guess all those years of watching Carmen San Diego really paid off-- I am super sleuth.

And yeah, I get it. Babys! Are! Exciting! Mazel Tov. However, the 'big announcement' will be a lot more authentic if you haven't already tipped everyone off.