Today > back when things were...

Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love?

Can the child within my heart rise above
Can I sail thru the changing ocean tides
Can I handle the seasons of my life...

If you know anything about me, you know my weird l-o-v-e of all that is Stevie Nicks. For some reason, these words have been stuck to me ever since listening to the band at Zhanras on Friday night as I sipped the most amazing Bloody Mary I've ever tasted.

Yes, things are changing. I got really frustrated last night with myself- but I guess I blamed my boyfriend. It's no secret our lives both changed so much when we got together. What I think he is "giving up" - like going out on Monday nights (while, in the past, I sat at home cursing my job and fact that I have to avoid drunk underage students while he gets to go have fun) turns out really isn't a sacrifice. I started looking at the fact that I don't even feel bad about all the drinks I'm missing at the beach bars (where they think a good drink is more vodka than soda or more gin than tonic-- and I'm just not looking for the quickand blurry buzz under the tiki torches anymore. Neither are my tastebuds.) In fact, I hear a stirring of self-improvement in my body now that I have outgrown my St. Augustine bar-crawling pants. Much preferred is a nice, albeit, expensive, dark beer at a bar that actually serves in pint glasses. Or- better yet- cooking grouper and having wine with a best friend at home.

And I guess I can't hold it against him when he says he agrees with me. ("Dancing is just as fun in the bedroom" he jokes...) What am I afraid of?

Hmmm. Sometimes I think I'm afraid of all this happiness. Silly me. (The child in my heart.)